Did You Know?

• There are more than 2,000 species of toenail.
Toenails are so-called because they 1) originate on toes and 2) were used as nails before nails were invented. In fact, the Great Pyramid of Cheops is held together by no fewer that one billion, billion individual toenails, many believed to have been clipped from the feet of the great Pharaohs themselves.
Toenail clippings make a very efficient anti-snoring device. Just position one up each nostril, thus ensuring a clear airway and marital bliss (after which you may either 1) smoke; 2) have a drink or 3) go to sleep.
Tony Curtis, the once famous Hollywood star, always puts a toenail up his nose before making love. His hint for would-be seducers: “Make sure the toenails are up your nostrils before you enter the bar. That way, there is no awkward fumbling in the bedroom which could delay getting to the awkward fumbling you were anticipating.
• Women are more interested in toenails as a topic of conversation than any other. Men prefer talking about nostrils.
• Women find toenails more exciting than fingernails. This is possibly because fingernails are often forced into unsalubrious orifices, like nostrils.

Information from the Toenail Society of Great Britain.

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Filed under Cheops, clippings, funny, humor, Humorous Features, humour, knowledge, nonsense, pyramid, satire, toenail, Tony Curtis, trivia

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